About two weeks ago I saw a craigslist pony for sale ad that appeared to meet all of my criteria.

A stocky gelding, that is the exact height I want, English/western, sounds like he is ready to go and he fits into my meager price range.

I followed the ad’s instructions and sent a text message inquiring about the pony’s age and location.  The age comes back as 8/9 and he is two hours away.  So I text back asking if I can call that afternoon.  “yes” is the response.

After work I give a ring and leave a voicemail.

Over the rest of the week I try another voicemail and another text.

No response.

So I figure they sold the pony and are just too inconsiderate to reply “sold” to my text.  Those 4 letters, so hard to text.

This Monday I see the ad renewed on craigslist.

What the… ok, a little irked now.

So I call back, I send another text and I reply to the craigslist post via email.

At this point, I already have red flags circling this pony, but I really want to know what the deal is.

Of course, there is no response.  So I try making a call at lunch time, and to my surprise, I get an answer.

Well, specifically, I hear the phone pick up and someone yelling to someone else for a minute while I say hello a few times. Then she comes on the phone and the whack-job alarm officially goes off.
During our very brief conversation she changes the ponies age from 9 to 7 and then to 6 years old.  She is sure if he is 13.2, and after asking twice, no she has not actually measured him, but she is “good at guessing”.  She insists he is not a kids pony, “he has too much spunk”.  I explain I am an adult and shopping for myself.  She continues with how great he is, he jumps, he trail rides, he goes English and western, and would make a great show pony for a kid.  I ask if he neck reins, “well I don’t know.  I haven’t ridden him”.

K, so what do you mean by, he goes western??? He carries a western saddle?

Then she mentions his “only vice”, which is that she can’t catch him.  Everyone else can, but she can’t.  “Which is the only reason he is not kid safe.  He is too hard to catch”.

Yeah, ok.

Next she says I can come try him out.  I say, “Would next Wednesday afternoon work for you?” and she says “I guess I can try and find someone to meet you this Friday morning, maybe.” I am literally making an ‘WTF’ face at my phone, but tell her I am busy until next week.  Then she tells me that she has had him for sale for a whopping two weeks and, get this, NO one has come to see him.  So she is taking him to an auction this weekend in Pennsylvania.  I roll my eyes and tell her, “well never mind then.  I wanted to come see him last weekend but you didn’t return my calls so I guess this just won’t work out.”

Then she says “well we might no sale him if we don’t get what we want.”  And that  I can “give her a ring next week”.  Yeah, cause calling her for the past two weeks was so effective.  Then she comes in with “I can find you a different pony.  I can work for you.”

It was all I could do to politely end the conversation with a “No Thank you”.

I mean really, how is she supposed to sell the pony if she doesn’t answer her phone or return calls?

And the pony shopping continues…

***If you click on this image of the ad, it gets big enough to actually read!